Messy Action Over Perfection, Always: The Birth of the Muskoka Sober Circle
When I try to reflect on the last week and a bit (I’m late putting this together—these blogs are supposed to go out on Sundays), it all feels like a bit of a blur. It’s funny how time works like that. When you’re in it, in the middle of the day or the week, it can feel like the clock is moving backward. And yet, when you look back on a week or a month or a year or a lifetime, it feels like no time at all has passed. It’s hard to put a finger on the moments that mattered.
Coming Back to Self-Employment
I re-launched myself into self-employment this month—June 2025.
This came after a year and a half of working full-time for a wonderful non-profit with a mission I deeply support, but knowing that it wasn’t the life I was meant for. Prior to that, I had taken a stab at self-employment as a website designer, copywriter, and virtual assistant of sorts. I was deep in a really toxic relationship with alcohol at the time, though, and when I got sober in August 2023, I realized that I needed to take a step back, give myself some financial security, and figure out who I wanted to be moving forward.
I figured it out, and it led me here—to building a business and a life that feels far more aligned with who I am, what I value, and the kind of impact I want to make in my little corner of the Universe.
Planting the Seeds of Something New
One piece of that is starting something new that is very close to my heart: The Muskoka Sober Circle.
When I reached a sort of culmination and “enough is enough” in my unhealthy relationship with alcohol, I didn’t really know where to turn except for my therapist. And while she was hugely helpful, she’s based in Toronto and doesn’t have lived experience with addiction, so she could only take me so far.
Together we googled potential local resources I could tap into, but we both came up pretty empty-handed—and I was left feeling hopeless.
I personally reached out to my local CMHA office asking for help, and I was given two options:
Get on the very long wait list (I was later told it was about 11 months) for a 90-day publicly-funded inpatient treatment, or
Go to AA.
With nothing in between.
I had already tried to go to an AA meeting, and for whatever reason, it didn’t feel like I was in the right room. I’ve since learned that it can take trying different meetings to find one that fits, but at the time, it felt like too much. The program just didn’t align with what I needed or wanted then.
I have absolutely nothing against AA—I know it has saved tens of thousands of lives and is an invaluable resource in the recovery community. It just wasn’t the right path for me.
Finding Community Online (and Wanting More)
I ended up finding community online via a podcast I listened to, and it was just enough to get me started. It wasn’t a program, but it was a place to open up about how I was struggling. First in a forum, then in a Zoom room. I felt seen for the first time. I heard from people with 10 days of sobriety, and people with 17 years. I remember the first meeting I spoke at—a woman shared that she was nine months sober and I was astounded. It didn’t seem possible. But I looked up to her. And I started to believe there could be a ‘there’ for me too.
But what I was really missing, and still think is missing here in my community, is a way to make these kinds of connections in person. A place to meet other people on this path—outside of a program, without needing to explain or justify.
Letting Go of ‘Ready’
I’ve had this idea in my head for quite some time, but didn’t feel like I had the bandwidth to launch it while working full-time. I also wanted to complete the next stage of the Recovery Coach Training program I started in Toronto in May.
But then I had a bit of an aha moment last week: growth doesn’t come from waiting until you’re ready. It comes from taking perfectly imperfect, messy action.
The truth is, I don’t have to wait until I finish the program to launch this. I don’t have to wait until I have every detail figured out. And I shouldn’t wait. Because there are people in this community who need this now—just like I did two years ago.
Starting Anyway
So I got started.
I snagged the Instagram handle @muskokasobercircle, I began putting content together, and I started following a few people. And honestly, I have little happy tears just from the response so far.
I’ve already had 34 people choose to follow along—most of whom I don’t know. I’ve had several people reach out privately to let me know they want to join.
The Power of Messy Action
So, I guess the biggest lesson of this past week is that messy action is always better than sitting on an idea.
And writing about it—for me—is the best way to process and track this kind of movement. Because there will come a time in a few weeks or months, and definitely years, where I forget the little moments that got me from here to there, wherever the next ‘there’ is.
Want to Process Your Own Story Through Writing?
Whether you’re newly sober, shifting directions, or simply feeling the stirrings of something new—you don’t have to wait until you’re ready. Writing is one of the most powerful ways I know to unpack what you’re holding, reconnect with your voice, and move forward with clarity and intention.
If you’d like guidance and support as you do that, I offer 1:1 writing coaching to help you process your story, your way. We don’t rush. We don’t polish. We write to get honest. And from there, we find what’s next.